from the last few days...
It is just wrong for a child to pass away. It's just wrong. And hard to see. Children are meant to grow old. But some are too precious and special to be left in this world.
It's been bugging me that the world just seems to keep on going when such a special person is gone from it. That went away yesterday while we were driving to the cemetary. Seeing all those people pulled over on the side of the road, stopped for Charlie, made me feel so much better about things. The world did stop for him, even if it was just for a few minutes and only on the way to the cemetary.
You have to laugh to keep from crying. It's not disrespectful, it's a way to cope. It's a way to remember such a wonderful life... My reasons for laughing: Getting ready for the wake, I got Taylor and Maddie ready first. While I was fixing my hair, Taylor got baby powder all over herself and Madison. There are pictures... but I don't know where they are right now. Another reason... At the funeral, taylor was being her usual self and wouldn't be still or quiet. I finally had enough and stood up to walk her out of the chapel. Only thing was, I had a strapless dress on (covered up with a sweater) and the top of my dress was at the bottom of my rib cage. Taylor had squirmed so much in my lap, it had slipped down without me knowing. I walked through the chapel, the overflow, and half the gym before I noticed it. Hopefully, not too many others did.
There is a plan for everyone of us. It is amazing what just a few little acts of kindness and love can accomplish. There have been 4 times in my life that I know I did what I was meant to do then. Meeting the Sandstrom boys and falling in love with them was one of them. The other three are marrying Chris, and having Taylor and Maddie.
Prayer is one of the most powerful tools we have. I don't know how else to put it other than that. And it is AMAZING what can be accomplished when we use it the right way.
Charlie's brothers told their mom and dad that they knew why his body was so cold. They said his soul was what made him warm. It's amazing to me the truth that little kids understand. I wish I understood all of this like they did. But I do have faith in the plan of salvation, and it may not be anywhere near perfect, but it's good enough for me for now.